-Franz Kafka, Blue Octavo Notebooks (via petrichour)
I love my boyfriend so much!
I got to see my best friend today!
After closing tonight I have two days off work!
EIGHT MORE HOURS I CAN SO DO THIS
-Chuck Palahniuk (Fight Club)
Sent my boyfriend the whiniest message about how much I miss him and how hard it is never seeing each other and how much I hate online communication. He was wonderful about it (of course) and immediately Skyped me and watched me cry for a bit and then made me feel better. Because he’s the best.
But ever since we hung up I can’t stop thinking about how I just can’t keep doing shit like that—to him, to me, or to our relationship. I can’t keep having these meltdowns, like when he left my house last weekend and I started sobbing. For fuck’s sake, he was here last weekend! What am I freaking out over?
I need to get my shit together. My eating has been on point but I need to get more active, and I need to start writing way more. And mostly, I have to adopt a more positive attitude pretty fucking quick. I need to do things with a smile on my face, whether it’s being at work or being at home. I need to hang out with more people and cultivate friendships instead of talking online all day with my best friend, who lives in NJ, and G, who lives in CT.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m super happy with the progress I’ve made. This time last year, I was just getting out of a mental hospital—so I can’t lose sight of how far I’ve come. But I’m slacking in a lot of ways, and it’s only hurting me (and G, when I start bitching out on him for no fucking reason).
So yeah. That’s where I’m at right now. Gotta go make some lists and maybe do some late-night laundry.
all im interested in right now is laying in bed and kissing a lot
we are more
than flesh can hold.
-Laura Grace Weldon, “Awake As You Sleep,” from Verse Daily. (via literarymiscellany)
-THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE by Blythe Baird (via coffeekaling)